Wedding Traditions: Out With The Old, In With The New

There are tons of wedding traditions that have been around since the dawn of time.

Some traditions are still timeless and integral parts of our wedding days and others, well, could be left with the horse and buggies in the past. 

Of course we are happy to encourage and enforce (gently) whatever traditions you want during your special day. That said, we’re here to tell you about how some of them no longer need to be implemented. As well, we can offer alternate ideas that are paving the way for new traditions and becoming increasingly popular. 

First Look

While it was customary for decades to see each other for the first time as one of you walked down the aisle, it has become much more common to share a “first look” hours before the ceremony. This is a beautiful idea for many reasons. 

For starters, it gives you this completely intimate moment where it’s just the two of you taking in the sight of the other for the first time on this monumental day. You can share private vows, some nervous laughter, and most likely some tears. 

The photographer and videographer, if you have one, will be there to capture it all and it will be cherished forever between the two of you. You can relive that first breathtaking moment when you saw the love of your life, whom you were about to marry, without the pressure of everyone staring at you. 

This also gives you a chance to take all of your wedding party and individual couple photos well before the ceremony and reception. Suits or dresses won’t be wrinkled, makeup and hair will still be perfect, and everyone will be riding the high that naturally comes before walking down the aisle. 

If you choose to skip a first look and share that moment as one of you walks down the aisle, that is still just as special. And we can promise you that whether there are 10 or 250 guests, in that moment, there will only be the two of you. 

No Specific Seating Side During the Ceremony

This can absolutely be something that you want to implement for your day, but we’re here to tell you that having a designated side for your wedding day is not that common anymore. Of course the first few rows are going to be reserved for immediate family and the couple can decide which side they want their family on in those first two rows, but otherwise, anything goes. 

We have found that people love to come and mingle with others while they wait for the ceremony to begin and sometimes that even spills into where you sit. Allowing this to be flexible will ease some stress. Perhaps one of you has a much bigger family than the other and your side would look more full. Doing it this new way can ensure that guests are evenly seated throughout and perhaps can even nab a seat closer to the front if one side becomes more populated. A cute way to do this is to have a sign at the beginning of the aisle with a rhyming phrase like “Pick a seat, not a side. We’re all family once the knot is tied.”      

Again, it is absolutely your choice as the couple as to whether or not you want to keep or ditch the assigned side. Just know that regardless of where they sit, all those guests are there for you!

Unplugged Ceremony

While compact cameras and smartphones may not have existed back in the 70’s, people have been snapping photos of the couple during the ceremony for a very long time. We get it; it’s this beautiful moment that people are sharing with a couple that they love dearly and they want to have images to remember it forever. It’s a really nice sentiment, but the follow through almost always comes at the cost of a flash, obstructing someone else’s view, the audible click of a camera button, or even getting in the way of the photographer’s professional shots. 

There is almost a 99.9% chance there is going to be a photographer at the wedding to capture every moment. From getting ready to the first dance, they won’t miss a beat. This is great because it means that guests can be entirely present while the couple exchanges their vows and enjoy the professional photos when they’re released. 

As for how to approach this, it’s quite easy. At the beginning of the ceremony once all the guests are seated, ask your officiant to let everyone know that this will be an “unplugged ceremony” and that everybody is asked to put away phones, cameras, and any other recording device. It can be said in a way that is firm but polite. Many couples also opt to have a sign at the beginning of the aisle or when you first walk into the ceremony area letting them know that this will be unplugged and explaining what that means. 

Yes, you may have that one person try to sneak out their phone and snap a photo or video during the ceremony and by that time, there’s not much anyone can do about it. But it will definitely help when 75 guests stand up to watch the couple make their grand entrance and don’t have their phones up to their faces instead of their smiles and undivided attention. 

Bridesmaid Dresses Don’t Have To Match

Another customary tradition is that bridesmaid dresses, if you’re having a wedding party that are wearing dresses, have to match. Nowadays, it is very common that each person in the wedding party will wear something different. 

You can absolutely choose to have them all wear the same color, or within the same color palette, or mix and match! There are endless opportunities that will look amazing! 

Not only can the colors, fabrics, and textures be different, so can the styles. The tradition of having each bridesmaid wear the exact same dress is really not that realistic. In a time where the world is finally embracing body positivity, this is the perfect opportunity to let your wedding party choose something that they feel confident in. 

Not every body is made the same, so how can we expect them to all feel and look their best in the same style?! While one person might opt for a strapless A-line dress, another might feel their most beautiful in a halter style or dress with thick straps. And as we all know, when we look good, we feel good. 

So let go of the idea that being completely uniformed is the way to go. Use this time to incorporate every beautiful color from your palette. Whether it’s blush tones, pastels, or rich burgundies and blues, let that wedding party help tie the whole look together with you! 

And this goes for groomsmen’s ties, too! They don’t have to match the bridesmaids’ dresses, nor do they have to match the groom. You can go without ties all together, go with bow ties, vests, jackets, or just a button up shirt and suspenders. The choice is yours!

Traditional Wedding Cake

While we all love cake, it is more common that a huge wedding cake will go mostly untouched. We understand why couples want to have a beautiful wedding cake to incorporate their colors or style in edible form, but there are lots of options that will save wasted cake and ensure you and your guests are happy. 

One idea is having a small cake for the two of you to have a traditional cake cutting and then serving cupcakes to all your guests. With cupcakes, you can display them in so many ways and also incorporate tons of flavors. Can’t decide between red velvet, carrot, chocolate, lemon, or vanilla?! Have them all! They can be decorated beautifully within your color scheme and are the perfect grab-and-go dessert for guests who are already busy mingling or tearing up the dance floor! 

Another option is to have a full blown dessert bar. Many caterers offer this already, or you can choose a bakery of your choice. From nanaimo bars and cheesecake to chocolate mousse cups, macarons, and tuxedo cake slices, the options here are also endless. 

Lastly, many couples choose to have a small but beautiful faux cake. They are usually made of styrofoam underneath and then decorated with icing in your colors, flowers, etc. Then you’d have a large sheet cake to cut and serve to guests. This is a much more cost-saving option than a four-tiered, four-flavored traditional wedding cake that can be difficult to cut! 

If you want the most elaborate and beautiful wedding cake, you absolutely go for it. Just know that if you were worried about it going to waste or being really expensive, there are tons of other options that are really common these days.

As you can see from this list, there are so many traditions that are evolving as time goes on. With your day, there is no right or wrong. But if any of these particular things were causing you some worry, we hope we’ve eased your mind. However you choose to plan your perfect wedding day, the details won’t matter as much as the true purpose at its core: exchanging vows with your person and getting to spend the rest of your life with them. And that is one tradition we know will never go out of style.

-K
xo